This blog is part of our Power of Healing series, which explores powerful journeys of healing and recovery and the resilience that fuels them
They say divorce is one of life’s most stressful events. For me, it began in 2019. After 18 years of marriage, my husband and I mutually realized our relationship was no longer working. No betrayal, no drama—just a gradual shift that left our home feeling uncomfortable. No one was thriving, including my 12-year-old. After careful consideration, we decided to part ways.
Here’s something about me: I don’t settle for “good enough.” If there’s room to grow, I take it. So, while navigating divorce and raising an almost-teenager, I also pursued a master’s degree. Then the pandemic hit. Suddenly, I was juggling a divorce, a teenager, an advanced degree, and a global health crisis—all at once.
✔ Divorce
✔ Teenager
✔ Master’s degree
✔ Pandemic
But did I acknowledge the toll? Nope. I kept pushing forward, determined to stay productive.
Fast forward to 2024. The divorce is final, my child is thriving, and my career is on track. I now work in mental health and resilience, teaching others to recognize stress and trauma. But here’s the irony—I never acknowledged my own.
Others noticed. “You’re not practicing what you preach,” they’d say. Even my daughter pointed it out: “Mom, you’re not being very resilient right now.” Still, I ignored it.
Then came the breakdown. In my kitchen. Over baby meatloaves. (Yes, baby meatloaves. That’s a story for another time.)
Hurricane Helene had just passed, leaving many with severe damage. My family was lucky—we only lost power for a few days and had to toss some spoiled food. But that spoiled food was my last straw.
Why? Because for years, I told myself my struggles didn’t “count” since others had it worse. My divorce wasn’t ugly. My degree was online. I had a supportive co-parent and family. I kept working through the pandemic. What right did I have to feel overwhelmed?
But here’s the truth: pain isn’t a competition.
I always say, “You have to feel it to heal it.” But I wasn’t following my own advice. I buried my emotions under busyness, convincing myself I was fine. Until I wasn’t.
That moment was my wake-up call.
It marked the beginning of what I call my Tara 2.0 era (because everything needs a Taylor Swift reference, right?) I started embracing self-compassion, prioritizing my health, and allowing myself to slow down. It wasn’t easy, but I learned that taking care of myself made me better equipped to care for others. And hopefully, my teenager is picking up on some healthy habits too.
Learning to Heal through Teaching Resilience
What really solidified my healing journey was the work I do leading resilience-building programs with Resilient Coastal Georgia. Facilitating the Community Resiliency Model (CRM), Resilience Enhancement and Leadership Model (REALM), and Positivity and Relaxation Training (PART) didn’t just help others—it changed me. In teaching these programs, I learned how to apply the concepts to my own life. CRM helped me understand how stress manifests physically and gave me tangible wellness skills to regulate my nervous system. Positivity & Relaxation Training reinforced the mind-body connection, showing me firsthand how practicing mindfulness techniques and challenging my thoughts could shift my entire mindset. I realized that healing isn’t about avoiding stress; it’s about learning how to process and move through it. These programs didn’t just help the community members I serve—I was learning right alongside them.
The Takeaway
Allow yourself to feel.
Don’t wait for a “big” trauma or crisis to force you into recognizing the importance of your own well-being. Life’s smaller challenges—when ignored—can pile up and have a profound impact. Give yourself permission to put yourself first. Because only when you take care of you can you truly thrive and show up for those around you.
If you’re going through something hard, know this: your feelings are valid. Take the time to acknowledge them. Give yourself the grace to feel and heal. Healing isn’t linear. It’s messy, uncomfortable, and sometimes it looks like crying over baby meatloaves. But it’s also freeing. The more we allow ourselves to feel, the more we create space for growth. Wherever you are on your journey, know that you are not alone. And please—give yourself the same grace and compassion you so freely offer to others. You deserve it.
Resources That Helped Me (and Might Help You Too!)
With Love, Your Friend by Hannah Neal – A beautiful journal that helps you explore self-compassion and shift unhelpful inner narratives.
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk – A must-read on how trauma affects the body and mind, with science-backed ways to heal.
Movement & Mindfulness – Yoga, breathing exercises, and simple walks can reconnect you to your body and emotions. What movement works best for you?
Insight Timer or Calm App – Guided meditations to help you slow down and reconnect with yourself.
Community Resiliency Model (CRM), Mindful Self-Compassion, Positivity & Relaxation Training – These programs teach resilience, mindfulness, and the mind-body connection. If you are interested in any of these programs, please email me at tara@coastalgaindicators.org or visit the Chatham County Safety Net Planning Council website to learn more.
Author's Bio:
Tara Jones is an engaged community health advocate in Savannah, GA, where she serves as the Director of Programs and Partnerships at the Coastal Georgia Indicators Coalition (CGIC) and leads Wellness Programming and Training for the Chatham County Safety Net Planning Council. She facilitates resilience programs with various organizations, including the Savannah Police Department and the Savannah-Chatham County Public School System, contributes to grant applications, designs wellness programs, and conducts data evaluation and report writing. Tara holds certifications as a Certified Personal Trainer, Certified Behavior Change Specialist, and Certified Nutrition Coach, and has received training in the Community Resiliency Model, Mindful Self-Compassion, and Trauma-Informed Weightlifting. She is also pursuing her 200-hour yoga teacher certification. Tara earned a Bachelor of Health Science from Georgia Southern University and a Master of Public Health from Liberty University. Above all, her most fulfilling role is being a mother to her teenage daughter.
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